Saturday, March 16, 2013

There is Only One Mom Like You {Dear Best Friend...}



It happened today. I compared myself to another mom. She makes it all look so easy. She is gorgeous, organized, laid back, her kids behave, they are outgoing, I know her house is clean, she seems to have it all together. As you step into motherhood you will be tempted again and again to compare yourself to that mom. You'll meet her at a playground, in your church group, at the beach. You may even be related to her. You will get the impression that she has it all figured out. 

Four years and two kids later, I know that I know better. I know comparing myself to others is foolish. I am me. There is no other mom on earth like me. Our family is unique, our kids are unique, my kids need me as their mother - not someone else. All of the imperfect me. All of the 'not blogging material' me. 

There will be days you'll be thinking "How does she make it look so easy?" 

What you really need to ask is "How can I figure out what works best for our family?" There is no right way, there is your way. All you really have to do is listen to your motherly intuition. When your baby is first put into your arms, you will know what they need. You can read and research. You can talk to other moms. You can exchange wisdom. But ultimately this is your story, your life, your kids and you don't have to be like anyone else. Let go of any guilt or envy, embrace this as inspiration to be an even better mom - knowing full well that nobody is perfect. Knowing that looks can be deceiving. 

You may remember my words several years down the road, when you are frazzled and sleep deprived and you get a glimpse of the life of another mom - put together, fresh, 'perfect'. Have you stepped into her home on a busy weekday? We all may have good moments and good days, but all moms have bad days. When things just seem to unravel. When the kids push all our buttons. 

Let's just focus on figuring out what makes a good day for our family. What makes a good lifetime for our kids. What can you do today to make tomorrow better, without regrets?

There is no other mom (or mom-to-be) on earth like you. 

PS: As a reader you may sometimes get the impression of me as a 'perfect' mom! I assure you, I am anything but! I have good days and bad days. I loose my temper, I let the dust bunnies run, my laundry piles up. I am human, trust me! My blog is meant to be inspiring, not to make you feel guilty. Take everything with a grain of salt and I hope what I share inspires you to be an even better mom to your children and better wife to your husband.

Do you ever find yourself comparing your self to other moms or your kids to other children?

This post is part of a series called {Dear Best Friend...}. See previous posts below:








9 comments:

  1. I do not compare myself to other moms. I also do not believe anyone else is a better mom than me. I am the best mom for my kids. When you look at other moms who you think have it all, don't forget there are things we DON'T see behind closed doors. So your house is spotless. How much precious time with your kids do you sacrifice to keep it that way? So what if my body isn't perfect. YOU and I ARE BEAUTIFUL. No I do not compare my kids to others. How could I? How unfair and selfish would that be? No, I don't think you're a perfect mom. Because nobody is. We are all human and humans make mistakes. My kids are older, (24 years and 12 years) and maybe it's because of my age that I have found peace and acceptance with myself and the world around me. Hopefully every young mom out there has this peace and acceptance, or finds it soon. Life is so much happier this way. :)

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    1. Thanks for your comment! I actually have come across many young moms who do not have this peace that you have with grown children. In the midst of raising little ones, they (we) often forget these things and I'm here to write about it and remind us all :) I appreciate your insight!

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  2. Awesome post Nastya! Thank you for encouraging...

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    1. You're welcome and thank YOU Julz, your comments are always encouraging too :)

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  3. I loved your blog today! Keep writing.

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    1. Thank you so much Margee, I am glad you enjoyed reading it! :)

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  4. I find myself comparing myself occasionally. It is hard not to do. Thanks for this!

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  5. This is such a struggle for most moms. I read a quote reminding us not to compare another's highlight reel with our behind-the-scenes. And isn't that the truth?! God created us each individually and to glorify Him. We are exactly how and where He wants us to be and resting in that, is liberating! :)

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    1. I've read that too! Facebook can make us feel that way sometimes because everything that's posted is everyone's 'highlight' and we shouldn't compare our every-day to that. Amen, we are here to glorify Him and once we realize that, it is FREEDOM :)

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