Are you in a season change in your life? I don't mean literally, but figuratively. New little ones arriving. Kids getting older. Kids leaving for college. I feel like we're in the midst of a change. No newborns or infants and finally nearing a time when I can leave the house with them without risking a tantrum in public. That coveted "diaper free" life on the horizon, potty learning... Then that thought of "we may not be done". Are we done? With kids? Everyone asks. Especially when you have one of each already! Like it's some sort of magic combination.
I look at them and simultaneously think "We could be done and I want another one". I've always been indecisive, but when it comes to having children, even more so. Most moments I just try not to think about the future but live in the present because my babies aren't babies any more. Sad and happy at that thought all at the same time. They are still my babies. They are big to me when I look at newborns, they are little to me when I look at teenagers. They become so, so precious in moments when I hear of parents loosing their babies.
In the throes of homeschooling and life-learning, I'm surrounded by other moms on a similar journey that truly appreciate how short of a time we have with our children. Some have little families, some have big ones. Some are religious, some aren't. Some stay home, some work part time, some work full time while managing to homeschool. All of them from a great variety of backgrounds and cultures. We all have one thing in common though - cherishing the time we have with our 'babies'. We're not perfect, but we really enjoy simply being present for our families. Because babies don't keep and life is short.
I don't want to paint a rosy picture. It's a great challenge and I'm not sure who is learning more, me or my children. I'm learning how to run a growing Boston area wedding photography business (new website and name by the way!). I have so much respect and solidarity for all business owning moms out there! I had no idea what I was getting myself into. My head is spinning with all the legal, bookkeeping, and financial stuff that goes into starting a business - hours upon hours of work that you do not get compensated for but have to pay for somehow. Then throw in a good measure of mommy guilt for the time I spend building the business while they nap, while they put on plays, play make believe, build with Legos, and just plain run around and drive each other nuts. I have to say though, this is also good for them, I can see how their free play time has shaped them into the little no-so-babies they are.
Are you in a similar season or someplace else? Babies growing? Jobs changing? Homeschooling? New arrivals?
How do you "live in the moment" through the routine of daily life?